Here are the promised pictures.  They are from “day 2” at the hospital, and by that time Jack was happy and spunky and ready to get out of his little PICU room.  Pictures from “day 1” would certainly have not been so cute and perky.  The CAT scan picture was from his second scan at 4:00 on Tuesday morning, and he was a little loopy while under the influence of some drug I wish I could have snagged.

Even though these pictures are fairly happy ones, I have a hard time looking at them.  The main word I think of when I think about Monday is “horror.”  Tonight as I was rocking him, kissing the top of his blond little head, and thanking God over and over for the gift of him, I just kept trying to shake the image out of my mind that moment when I thought I had lost him forever.  I also thought back to that moment when I was carrying him down the hall to his first CAT scan and he was stroking my hair and I thought to myself, “Even if he has brain damage, at least he is still loving and affectionate.  If my baby can still lovingly stroke my hair like this, I can be OK.”  Then, later, when he smiled at me, I thought again, “Even if he’s not the same little boy he was this morning, at least he can smile at me.  I love that smile.  If I can see that smile, I’ll be OK.”  Now I just look at my perfect little boy in absolute wonder.  I love him.  I know you all know that already, and I certainly knew it as well, but you’ve got to understand, I thought I had lost him, and I didn’t.  He’s alive.  He’s babbling and laughing and trying at every possible opportunity to engage in the very dangerous activities he has been strictly ordered not to participate in.  I have suddenly become a Helicopter Mama, but that’s OK.  I’m just so happy to be his mama.

Enjoy the pictures, and feel free to stop by anytime and kiss the top of his cute head.

Jack’s 2nd CAT scan

Before the second CAT scan (or maybe after–I can’t remember). This is bedhead…not pigtails. 🙂

I may be falling out of my hospital gown, but I don’t even care!

Vroom.  Vroom.  (His arm wasn’t injured, btw.  The nurses wrapped up his arm so he wouldn’t yank out the IV)

A view of the hardest, noisiest crib ever.

I love those eyes.

I just can’t quit kissing that head.

I am ready to go HOME!

I rule the PICU!

6 thoughts on “hospital pictures

  1. lindsey says:

    I love the “I RULE PICU” one…so cute. I’ll take you up on kissing the top of that blonde lil head. What a doll, er, I mean, stud of a little boy!

  2. Christa says:

    Oh Jill, I can’t even imagine the horror you must have felt. How terribly scary!!

    I guess it has been a while since I have seen you, Jack is so big. I was imagining him as a baby in a hospital bed. He is becoming quite the BIG BOY now. He is still as cute as ever!!!

  3. Ellen Reynolds says:

    Oh Jill, Matt,& Amelie,

    I am so relieved to know Jack is okay after a scary fall. You poor dears. But I am proud how the two of you coped and supported Amelie through this ordeal. Boys are so active. Casey had a couple of close calls when he was little.

    It’s experiences like these that make you believe in miracles and faith in God. I am grateful it is behind you.

    Love you all,

  4. tonkelu says:

    He looks so very, very tiny in those pictures. I’m glad he’s recovering well enough to make you a helicopter mom. 🙂 It did my heart a world of good to see him, in all his Little Jack glory, the other day. I still say he needs a helmet!

  5. karmenl says:

    poor baby!!! his little face is so sweet!

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